I just got back my grades for this sem. I think it was actually quite good. But in my heart I thought... how nice if I could actually do better than even that.
And I just think right now. I know that that is the wrong attitude. I should just be very thankful with all that I have for 1 Timothy 6:6 says that godliness with contentment is great gain.
I was thinking about whether or not to post this one up, but I guess I should. It's regarding the reality of spiritual warfare. I've never experienced anything quite like this before, and in the midst of it, I admit that I was a lil unnerved. But I'm glad I went through it.
Last night at about 0030 HRS (as in this morning, to be exact), I was lying on my bed. I heard sounds to the right of my bed, the boxes below my bed being knocked, something like when my kor enters the room. I wanted to turn my head to see who but I couldn't move it. Couldn't even open my mouth to speak. My whole body was pinned down. Couldn't move my hands or feet.
So I kept calling on the name of Jesus and eventually I could move and speak again. Got up and prayed and rebuked whatever it was. Called Caleb and was like telling him, "okay (he experienced a similar thing years back in BMTC), I believe you now."
As I went out on my morning run this morning (I've been using my runs as part of my prayer time), I meditated on what exactly it was all about. I guess the things I've been doing lately have kind of been a threat and irritation to the enemy. I guess that the reason for the spiritual attack was two-fold. Firstly, just like the enemies of Nehemiah tried to intimidate him as he built the wall, this spiritual force must have been trying to intimidate me. Secondly, perhaps there was some hurt that it was trying to cause me, not that it succeeded.
I also recalled that in Daniel 10, the angel sent with a message to Daniel was detained by the "prince of the Persian kingdom". So demonic forces can actually detain or halt people on God's side. But such warfare does not equate to those on our side getting hurt. I might say from 2 Corinthians 4:8 that I was hard pressed but not crushed (even though me taking this verse in such a literal sense would probably be quite arguable).
So yes, on retrospect was a very good experience. But I've gotta take the same measures as Nehemiah. Keep myself guarded.