Tuesday, June 19, 2007

A little look in the mirror

Having my lil long break still. Enjoying my work outs...

Physically I'm quite strong.

Spiritually not all is well. Yet good food can only be savoured when one is hungry.

The physical part of me is looking forward to the next stage of training. Of fighting and taking a few whacks that'll make me tougher. (People have called me masochistic... hmmm. Juniors in ODAC used to call me Bian Hai Yong- and yeah quite an honour). But truth be told, there's really IS something NICE to the pain you feel in exercise. ENJOY the pain and start smiling. The day will come when you can no longer enjoy the pain and your body can no longer take such training. When your muscles ain't as hard and strong as before. Something like Ecclesiastes 12.

The more spiritual part? Welllll. Not that good. It's shitty going into tougher times without being close to your God. Want to go into wherever I go and start a cell group. Need the support. Need help to spread the gospel.

I have learnt that some days in NS you won't feel quite so tough. You'll feel like giving up. At least for my coy- Heard that Caleb Lim? At the start you want to tell others about God and as things go by and you get so shagged out you just want to get the next job done so you can rest a lil. So well... perhaps I have been running on my own strength. And perhaps the current dryness is to show me I desperately need God's strength?

Used to think that living a life without God's strong presence must be kinda easy. I mean, can go and sin a lil and still have salvation. Can choose to not spend so much time on QT. Can mix around and say anything I like around many many many friends. Can flirt around a bit perhaps, like some of my friends do.

But hey man, out of touch with God for a while only and I know which life is better. Maintaining a close walk with God is hard. There's only one thing harder. Not having that walk at all.

1 comment:

pamela said...

Hey ty,
gd to hear that youve passed out, and have a break! i'm sure it's much needed...
You look really much darker now, like my bro during his POP too. heh.
Yeah physical fatigue does take a toll on the spirit as well... its ok to feel dry if it makes us thirst more for Him... Psalm 63

Thnx for reading my blog. i've gotten over my 2-1. heh. yeah i know i ask for too much too often... i'm ok with it now lar. i'll be starting my prison training in Jan 2008, and it'll be my turn to get FIT!